


Goober?

by Bluemedallion



Category: Carmen Sandiego (Cartoon 2019)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Chaotic Good, Chases, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Random & Short, Seriously this is so much crack, SpongeBob SquarePants References, break in
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2020-04-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:15:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23454643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluemedallion/pseuds/Bluemedallion
Summary: Who doesn't like Goofy Goober Rock?
Comments: 1
Kudos: 6





	Goober?

**Author's Note:**

> Hi I havent written in like a year and a half but I started reading carmen sandiego stuff and then I did the dishes while bopping to the spongebob soundtrack and this happened. I would apologize but I know this is godly. Jkjk 
> 
> Thanks for reading
> 
> Also the mc is nonbinary or just up to interpretation gender

"Perhaps you Americans don't have quite the most awful music taste in the world. This is not bad." The person startled from their jam, dropping the porcelain plate they were wiping. It shattered on the kitchen floor as they whipped their head to the source of the unfamiliar voice, finding a blank eyed man crawling in through their window.

"Who the fuck are you and also get out of my house!" They yelled incredulously, quickly grabbing a knife from the open dishwasher and dropping the towel they held on the ground. "I'm warning you despite the lack of coolness I possess I actually know how to use a fucking knife!"

"I doubt it. I am a highly trained thief so you really do not stand a chance. But I am not here for you, so do not worry." The man said, his strong french accent coming through in his voice, that they had just noticed as the man stood up straight and Jesus Christ he was tall. And scary. And unfamiliar and IN THEIR HOUSE.

" _I'M A GOOFY GOOBER! ROCK!_ " Their speaker shouted.

The Frenchman's nose scrunched in confusion. "What is a 'goober'?" He asks, quickly walking through their house. They're shaken by that, slightly lowering their knife. Quick as a flash the man turned around, instantly disarming them. He held the knife in his hand, smirking a bit.

"Please don't kill me. Also a goober is like… a silly person I guess? Also please don't kill me." They begged, terrified, holding up their hands. The man laughed heartily, setting the knife on a nearby table.

"Goober… what a silly word. I like the song though, I will look it up when I'm done." He nodded, making his way to the front door. They grabbed the knife again, obviously and followed him. "That still begs the question of what the fuck you're doing here!"

They both whipped their heads back towards the kitchen, hearing the loud thump of another person jumping through the window. They whipped their head back to the man who had a look of fear on his face.

"Who the fuck are you people!" They yelled, hearing footsteps rushing towards them.

"I must go!" The Frenchman rushed, quickly unlocking their front door.

" _—AND NO GIRL E-VER WANTS TO DANCE WITH A FOOL WHO WENT AND! RIPPED HIS PANTS!_ "

The french man paused, turning around with his nose scrunched in disgust. "Perhaps you do not have as good music taste as I thought." He caught sight of the lady in red who rushed into the room and panicked, shutting the door and running out of their property.

They swung their knife towards the lady in the red cloak, stilling her to a stop. "Who the fuck are you people!" They yelled, staring intensely into their eyes.

"I am so sorry for him. Currently I am chasing him, and he is getting away, and I'm so sorry we came into your house like this. Thank you for slowing him down, and now I HAVE to go. Le Chevre is getting away!" She explains, then swiftly twirls around them and runs out the door.

"...well. Bye." They shrugged incredulously, locking the door. "I am NEVER leaving my window open again. That's what I get for liking air I guess."

**Author's Note:**

> This is literally pure crack cocaine in a ao3 post you're welcome


End file.
